God's Best For Your Life
This is the rough draft of Pastor Steve’s message from the first week of “Rooted Revisited” on October 6th, 2019. You can also watch the message here. We hope you find this helpful as you pursue your next steps in Christ
I walked out onto my driveway one morning getting ready to go to work and my sprinklers were going full tilt. I thought, “that’s weird, I don’t have them programmed at all.” In fact, I hadn’t used them in months. So, I did the obvious. I went over to the sprinkler box and it was unplugged. So, how are they on? I then went to the main water valve that went into my house and turned it off. But the sprinklers were still going. How in the world are they working with no water and no electricity? I bet I spent at least a half an hour trying to figure that out on my own. I’m thinking internally, “Man, I didn’t know what to do. I’ve done all I know to do.”
I had this quick thought, “I need to ask someone for help.” Then I told quickly told myself. “Nah, I got this.” I mean, in a split second I shot down help. I have people that I can go to and at least ask, ‘hey what do you think?” After I shot that thought down of asking someone for help, I went back trying to do the same thing. And I ended up with the same results. I couldn’t fix it or change it. That got me thinking. What is it inside of us that knows we need help in life, but we resist it? Why do we resist community when it’s so key to our growth?
Today we are dropping back into a series called Rooted. The central idea with this series is this; Rooted people last. People rooted deeply in their faith in Christ make it. They make it In life. In marriage. In business. In parenting. In the difficulties of life. People who take care of their relationship with Christ and feed those roots of faith last when life gets challenging. And we have talked about some very tangible things that we can do to be more rooted and to last more in our lives. What grows deeper roots in Christ? Community. Wherever you turn in Scripture we find this understanding that we are meant to do life and faith with others.
Behold, how good and pleasant it is when people dwell together in unity! Psalm 133:1 (ESV)
Good and pleasant, wow! I want that. How many of us would sign up for what is good or what is pleasant in life? We all would. You want what is good and pleasant in this life? Then, here you go!
Behold, how good and pleasant it is when people dwell together in unity! Psalm 133:1 (ESV)
Goodness comes when people spend time together. Goodness comes when people invest in one another’s lives. And the context of dwelling is what? Community! This idea of doing life together. The idea of my life is involved in yours and yours is involved in mine. And that which we are unified around is Christ.
What David says right here is what the entire Bible teaches. If you want to make it in this life, you need others. You have to have a circle of Jesus followers in your life that is with you in community. Those who take that step, they grow. Those who have that circle, they last. Why? They are rooted in Christ through community.
And yet, even though most of us know that Biblically and even intellectually, there is little movement of that in our lives. And dare I say, maybe we are at a standstill in some area of our life simply because we are not walking in obedience in being in community? We are not really dwelling together in unity with those pursuing Christ.
So here is my question? Why? If we know it, why don’t we take that step. I believe there that we allow or we even put up some obstacles. Which leads me to this question. What are the obstacles of community? One, personality. Whether it is our personality or their personality, I can’t do community. I’m too shy. I’m too introverted. They talk too much. They are too extroverted. They are quirky. They are difficult. Yeah, they are difficult, but guess what? You are difficult too We all are on some level, but it doesn’t have to be an obstacle.
Two, perceptions. There are so many misperceptions when it comes to being in community that there is no way I can cover them all. How about these. You know, that community stuff is touchy-feely, right? And I hear that from guys mostly. I’m not sure where that comes from, so let me set the record straight. Guys, real Biblical community is not hugfest USA. You don’t share your inner most feelings when you walk in the door.
Three, past experiences. Often times the perceptions, which I just mentioned, are because we had bad experiences. We think we can’t contribute in the group because there was that one time that someone talked down to us. We believe it’s touchy-feely because someone shared something in a group experience that was spot on in our life. That moment convicted us, so rather than dealing with it in my own life, I’m disengaging. For many of us, it’s simply pain. We put ourselves out there, got hurt and we don’t want to get hurt again.
Four, privacy. Isn’t it ironic that we are giving away our privacy every day? Every time we click on one of those terms of agreement without even reading it, we are giving our privacy away. Every time we get on social media to post a picture of our family or post something random like, “it’s 2am and I can’t sleep.” What are we doing? We are giving away privacy to some degree. We give it away so easily. Yet, with what matters most, realy community, we resist. Here is our rationale. “I can’t do community, what would they think?” I can’t open up to others, you know why? They will see the real me. And in the real me, there is some disconnect with my faith and my actions. I can’t have that.” So we pull inward and let no one see the real me.
That leads me to a couple of questions. Which of those obstacles have prevented you from building community in the past? Just be honest. Which of those obstacles is getting in the way of community right now?
You know, because of my role as a pastor I get to walk with people through some of the most challenging times of their lives. And I have seen God do some amazing things in the lives of people. I have seen him restore hope. I’ve seen him heal broken relationships. I’ve seen him deliver people from their pasts and their addictions. A key factor in those in whom I’ve seen God work is those who lay down these obstacles, and who engage in community. They have given their best to God because part of their best is doing life with others.
However, I’ve also seen the opposite. I’ve seen people not listen to Jesus in this area of life. It sounds like this. “You know, I’ve tried my best, and I'm done trying to help them.” Or this. “We have worked so hard. We have given it our best, but we are calling it quits in our marriage.” Even in the life of the church. “You know, we just don’t feel it here anymore. I’ve given it my best shot and I think God is leading me elsewhere.” And yet, in so many of those interactions I’ve had over 28 years of ministry, I want to say something like this. “You gave it your best? Really? Well how is that possible when part of “your best” lacks real, honest christian community?”
There is this great story that Jeus teaches that you may or may not know. Today, I want to look at through a new filter. In the book of Matthew Jesus speaks of an owner going out of town and leaving his employees some resources. He implores them to use them well. In other words, “do you best with what I leave you.” He gives one of them 5 talents, another two talents, and the last employee 1 talent. The first two guys go to town and invest what their boss gave them. In fact, they both make money for their boss and this is how he responds.
“His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’ Matthew 25:21
“Great job. Way to go. Thank you for being faithful. Thank for taking what I gave and doing your best with it. Because of that, I’m going to bless you.” Well, the last dude didn’t quite do the same as the first two. He took what his boss gave him and he hid it. No investment. No hard work. Not really his best and here is the result.
“His master replied, ‘You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? 27 Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest. Matthew 25:26-27
You couldn’t even put it in the bank to get minimal interest? Really? That’s not even close to your best.
“‘So take the bag of gold from him and give it to the one who has ten bags. 29 For whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. Matthew 25:28-29
The boss takes away what he gave to this employee. In this context, God is the owner and we are the stewards. God gives every single one of us resources; spiritual gifts, passions and finances. They all come from him and he calls us to use them as good stewards in this life. He blesses those who put their best into it. And what else? He takes away and has harsh words for those of us who squander what he has given us.
When I read this week’s ago, I really felt like God wanted me to look at this through the filter of community. I felt God wanting me to challenge us with a new perspective. What if one of the greatest gifts that God gives us is Christian community? What if one of the greatest resources he puts into our lives to steward is the gift of “dwelling together in unity” or “doing life together?” And in turn, when we do our best, when we are faithful in community, God blesses us as we see in this parable. When we do this and take the steps to live in community, that is when we experience what is good and what is pleasant? Are you with me so far? Community is a gift!
However, what about the opposite? What about when community is absent from our lives and we have not been faithful with it? “Hey Jesus, I did my best.” He says,” No you didn’t.” We respond, “what do you mean?” “You didn’t give your best. You ignored one of the greatest resources I gave you to grow and root your faith. Others. Community. Dwelling together.” Is it possible that we could hear, like in this story, some of Jesus’ harshest words when we excuse away community? In fact, is it possible that we are not experiencing God’s best for our lives because we ignored his best for us, which is true Christian community?
So why do we see over and over again in scripture God put such a heavy emphasis on relationships? Why?
Why is community part of God’s “best” for me? One, It’s where I receive wisdom for life.
He who walks with wise men will be wise, Proverbs 13:20
If you want to be wise, you have to do life with wise people. You have to let people of wisdom into your circle.
One of the dirty little secrets of parenting that my kids have caught onto is that parents help parents in parenting. They don’t like it. But parents, isn’t that one of our secret weapons? Wise parents talk to each other and share ideas. Wise parents help each other handing social media with their kids. Wise parents talk about how to pray for their kids and how to handle a strong-willed child. Right parents? We say things to each other like, “Hey, this is what worked for us and this is what didn’t. You could try this form of discipline” Or, “We tried this for a season and it really seemed to make a difference. You could pray this way.” Am I right?
Sometimes when we have tried something new in our parenting with our kids, do you know what they say? “Who did you get that idea from? Another parent? Who told you to do that? Who told you to try that? Keisa and I have learned that if we are going to be the kind of parents God calls us to, we have to be in community. We have to spend time with and ask questions of those who are wise. We have to walk with those who are wise in following Jesus and who have a track record of wisdom in parenting. Pick any area of life, and it applies.
Wisdom fuels wisdom in our lives and the conduit through which it passes is community.
If you want to be a better Jesus follower, you need to spend time with other Jesus followers. If you want a better marriage, you need to spend time with other Jesus followers who have a healthy marriage. If you want a stronger business, you need to spend time with those Christ-followers who have learned a thing or two about business. Maybe the reason we are at a standstill in life is that we are missing those voices of wisdom?
Now, as a side note, community is not just receiving, but it’s also giving. Why is community part of God’s “best” for me? Two, It’s where I give away wisdom for life. It’s our chance to help others take their next step too.
Are there any of you who are wise and understanding? You are to prove it by your good life, by your good deeds performed with humility and wisdom. James 3:13
If you love Jesus, prove it. If you are growing in faith, prove it. And the way to prove it is not by reciting information, it’s by giving away the transformation that Christ has done in you. James says, “ok, don’t keep what you have. Don’t ball hog what others have poured into you. If your roots are deep share what you know. If you are in a season of growth, give it away. Jesus followers who are growing prove it with their life and heir deeds. With humility, serve someone else with your time, your advice and your prayer.
What if Biblical community really is about giving away your life? What if it means sitting down with a mom who is struggling with the discipline of her kids. It’s you listening. It’s you sharing your struggles and how you overcame the same challenges a few years back. Guys, what if that means really listening to one of your friends who daily wrestles with lust. As you listen to his feelings of guilt, you let him see that God values him and cares for him. And in your transparency, you share with him how you’ve learned to have self control. You pass along some wisdom on how to bounce your eyes and take control of your thoughts through God’s Holy Spirit.
Christian community brings the best into my life and challenges me to give my best away to others.
Here you go, here is the transformation I’ve experienced in Jesus. Take it so can have God’s best for your marriage. Take it so you can face your fears with great hope. I want you to experience the best of Jesus. Here.
He who walks with wise men will be wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm. Proverbs 13:20
The writer then tells us what happens when we don’t walk with the wise? Life takes a bad trajectory. Now, we could spend a lot of time here talking about what to look for who we should or should not be in community with. Let’s save that for another day. Instead, let’s talk about a companion that often is a greater obstacle than people. In fact, it’s not a who at all. It’s a what. It’s this; Pride. Sometimes the most foolish companion that we hang out with is our own pride. What gets in the way of our vulnerability? Pride. Why do we worry about what others think if we tell our story? Pride. Why do we push others away? Pride.
Remember those sprinklers of mine? They are spraying all over the place and I have tried everything I know and it’s not working. Remember I had this quick thought, “I need to ask someone for help.” Then I told quickly told myself. “Nah, I got this.” Eventually, I make two phone calls. One to a gentleman that is a great great handyman and another call to a gentleman who is a professional arborist and who knows a thing or two about sprinklers. I asked for help. I needed wisdom. Within 15 minutes, wisdom showed up on my lawn.
Long story short, the grandson of this arborist comes over and is able to locate a central panel that is buried about a foot below the grass. It was in a completely random place. Roots had grown through my system and had broken and stop valve which allowed the sprinklers to go like crazy. He fixed it like it was nothing. I would have never found that box underground. Never. I have lived their for four years and mowed over that spot repeatedly. I would have never found it and I definitely didn’t have the wisdom to find it or even repair it.
Now, my sprinklers got fixed. The story ended well. But do you know how long I resisted calling someone? On the inside I was saying, “I can figure this out. I got this.” Pride. Also this. “Ah, I don’t want to bother anyone. I’m sure they are busy and have lots going on. The last thing they need is my sprinkler issues.” Pride. There’s more. “If I call someone, they are going to think I’m incapable.” The truth is I was, but it’s better to pretend that I’m not incapable that actually admit it by asking for help. Right?” Pride. I did all of that and it’s only sprinklers.
Here’s my question. How often do we do the same but with greater issues in life? What are we carrying on our own and not letting others in to help with? How? “You know, we are about to lose our home and we have tried everything.” But no one knows that. “The kids have really struggled at their new school and we just don’t know what to do. They feel lost and we fell lost too.” But no one has been let in.
“I’ve been battling suicidal thoughts so much lately. We’ve been faking it in our marriage for awhile and we feel like giving up. My heart still aches over my abortion. What would my baby have been like if I chose life? Our finances are in such a mess. I don’t know where to turn.” I’ve heard all of those and more.
So, we respond, “Wow, I had no idea. How long has this been going on?” Their response. “Six weeks. Ten days. 8 months. Two years.” My response. “Really? Who is walking with you? Who have you told or who is praying with you? And more often than not, people say; “No one knows. We didn’t want to bother anyone. We wanted to say something, but we were so embarrassed. We thought we’d just figure it out on our own.”
My heart breaks when I hear stories like that or when I hear people respond in that way. Can we be honest what part of that is? Pride. Maybe mixed in with some regret and shame. Proverbs nails it. Pride says, “I don’t need others. I don’t want to bother others. They just won’t understand.” We have to change that thinking because it only leads us to harm. I believe God has better for you and I and its found in community. I believe God’s best for you is good and pleasant and we experience that when we dwell together in Christ-centered community.
So here is my challenge for you. Give community a chance. To have Gods’ best, you have to take a step of faith or a step of faith again. I believe it is worth the chance because it is what God has wired us for. Give community your time. The only way you will receive the wisdom that God has for you is in relationships. And all good relationships take time. There are no shortcuts. Give community your commitment. Community is worthwhile but it requires an all-in attitude. It takes loads of courage and perseverance.
So the way we do community here at Turning Point is what we call life groups. A life group is a small group of people, about 8-12 people or so, who meet weekly. These are people from all different backgrounds. Some are new in their faith and some have known Jesus for awhile. The common ground is that we all want to take the next step in our faith in Christ. The common ground is that no one can do it alone, but together, we can gain wisdom and help for the easy and challenging parts of life.
These groups meet weekly for about 75-90 minutes. During that gathering, they eat together, study God’s Word together and build relationships. And guess what? No one has to be perfect. No one puts you on the spot or calls you out. No one has all the right answers. It’s a safe place to grow your faith. We do groups in semesters and this semester starts now and lasts until for eight weeks. It’s an easy on-ramp and off ramp to kick the tires of community and see how God grows you and how you can grow in relationship.
Today I’m challenging you to take that next step. I’m asking you to give life groups a chance, to give it your time, and to give it your commitment. Experience what God has for you in community. Give your life away in community.
Today you can step out into our lobby and sign up and have a conversation with one of our groups leaders. You an also sign up in the app or online or investigate more at tpclive.org/lifegroups
Let’s pray before we go today.
If you want a good and pleasant life, as the Psalmist describes, you have to give -your best. That best is realized in real community, not by yourself. Today, let’s take that next step. Let’s pray!